A Mother of A Leader

Once again, I was twittered this insightful and heartwarming article that I would like to share with you. Please feel free to add your comments here or send a note to the author - Erin Schreyer - with your thoughts.

Have you hugged a leader today?

This past Mother’s Day weekend, I thought a lot about the joy I have with my children, as well as the blessings I have received from my own mother.  Mothers have a deep sense of pride in what we do.  We want to do it well because we sense that the impact our efforts will shape the lives of our children forever.

When I think about the responsibilities of being a mother, they are great.  Often, they are synonymous with the characteristics of outstanding leadership.  Think of the parallels:

Mothers and leaders must be inspirational and visionary.

They can’t waste energy on obstacles, difficult situations and “I can’t.”  Instead, they must forge ahead – goal-oriented – breaking barriers with optimism and encouragement, showing their family that creative solutions can bring success.  Moms are problem-solvers, out-of-the-box thinkers who want to push the limits and provide for their children.  In a sense, weren’t Moms the first entrepreneurs?

Remember the inspiration she gave you, so that you had the belief you could do anything?  Even before the words “entrepreneur” or “inspiration” existed, mothers had paved the way by bringing us into this world and providing a vision of how great our lives can be!  Likewise, leaders should inspire to bring out the best in their teams.  They should encourage and support fresh, new ideas, be ready to take some calculated risks and celebrate the rewards of taking their organizations to new and exciting places.

Mothers and leaders add value by serving others.

As stated by John Maxwell in The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership… “the bottom line in leadership isn’t how far we advance ourselves but how far we advance others.”

From the day you were born, you mother nurtured you, supported you and sacrificed for your well being.  Yes, mothers often put the needs of their children ahead of their own….and they do so to build into them and give them the greatest tools, abilities and methods to achieve success.  “What can I do for you?” is a commonly used phrase. That’s leadership at its finest!!  An organizational leader should be sure they are empowering their team, giving credit where credit is due and being generous by sharing his/her time, knowledge and resources.

Mothers and leaders must be able to connect emotionally to others.

Primal Leadership: “Even if they get everything else just right, if a leader fails in this primal task of driving emotions in the right direction, nothing they do will work as well as it could or should.”   

Think of a time in your life when you felt emotionally hurt and you shared that with your mom.  She made you feel better, didn’t she?  Moms are not only good listeners, but they have a way of knowing just the right thing to say to help you move forward in a better direction.  Moms acknowledge their children, express empathy and connection, and then they leave you with a sense that you can do better next time.  Leaders should also realize that their emotions are contagious.  If they resonate positive energy and enthusiasm, it will likely rub off on their teams.  That emotional connection may take everything else to the next level.

Mothers and leaders must know when to lead and when to let go.

John Maxwell writes “Good leaders recognize that when to lead is as important as what to do and where to go. Timing is often the difference between success and failure in an endeavor.”

The greatest responsibility of parenting is raising our children to be the best they can be…out on their own.  It’s years of building into them to let them go and flourish.  Throughout their childhood they need their mom’s guidance, love, and support.  We must lead them….and we must let go – just like that spectacular moment when you let go for your child’s first two-wheeled bicycle ride.  Moms must lead when needed and let go when needed.  The same is true for great leadership.  There are times to step up and lead, and there are times to allow others to do the work.  There are times when decisive actions need be taken, and a good leader knows how to identify these and make them happen.

There are many likenesses, indeed, between mothers and leaders.  And in fact, yes, mothers ARE leaders in many respects.  The biggest differentiating factor, however, is that a mother’s love is deeper, more passionate, protective and joyful than any business can bring.  While we can enjoy our careers and business leadership, the fact remains that no earthly act is more gratifying than being a mother and being loved in return by your children.  That unconditional emotioncan inspire even the greatest of all leaders. 

Have you experienced a leader who possessed the attributes of a great mother? How did it impact your performance? How have you taken the example provided by a great mom and demonstrated that to your team? If you have, how did they react? I would love to hear an example of maternal leadership that has paid off in real results with your team! Please share.

 

——————————————————————— Erin Schreyer is the Owner and Managing Partner of Sagestone Partners, LLC. She can be reached at eschreyer@sagestone-partners.com.

Image Source: wahmbreakcafe.com

Add comment May 13th, 2009

Are you a “Captain Oblivious”?

Another article I found to be helpful in these interesting times……

Are you a ‘Captain Oblivious’?

I have been fortunate in recent months to have had the opportunity to work with Rob Goffee and Gareth Jones, two of the most innovative and provocative thinkers on the authentic leadership landscape today. Among their many pearls of wisdom is one that has struck me as being essential in these other-worldly times: Leaders must be skilled situational sensors. Everyone seems to agree that there is no true precedent for the tumultuous times we’re in and thus no obvious road map or playbook that leaders can consult. The situations change so fast that we need to continuously stay attuned to the mood, context, emotions, subtle forces and shifting plates of the workplace and marketplace. Otherwise we risk being ‘Captain Oblivious,’ joining that rogues gallery of leaders with tin ears so obtuse that our jaws drop when we hear them try to convey empathy with the world around them. As they appear in front of lawmakers, the press, shareholders or their employees, we cringe as they seem so out of touch with their constituents.

The exercise of leadership is clearly contextual.

Effective leaders understand that there is no universal formula, no guaranteed way of ensuring their leadership impact. On the contrary, they practice and hone their situational sensing skills. They observe and collect ’soft data’, picking up behavioral cues and reading the atmosphere or ‘vibe’. They confirm their assumptions and analyze the data to understand its implications for their leadership actions. The antennae of effective leaders are continuously at work because situational sensing is not at all episodic. Less-effective leaders think “I took the pulse last month; I know what’s going on.” Yet everything is changing, new news is being processed. You can’t assume you understand how people feel right now if your data is a month old. There are two critical questions that authentic leaders constantly ask:

• “How can I be sure I am collecting soft data all the time?”
• “How can I be sure I am interpreting the soft data correctly?”

You can improve your situational sensing:

Increase your observational prowess. Keep a journal to record as much soft data as possible over a fixed period of time. Stay alert to your dark interludes, when for whatever reason your antennae are down and you seem to go on autopilot. Give yourself a second chance to read the data and interpret it. Test your assumptions with others to identify patterns where you tend to misread signals. Widen your lexicon. The depth and breadth of the words you have available to describe a given situation will enable you to more accurately sense what may be going on and also help you remember finer details. Malcolm Gladwell’s Blink highlighted many instances where a superior lexicon allows the observers (or wine tasters in one example) to notice, remember and categorize senses to a finer, quicker and more accurate degree. Understand your own network. Pay attention to the origins of information, quality of the information and lens through which your contacts interpret things. Is your network just an echo chamber repeating your views or is it a true source of fresh information? Is your network broad enough to provide all the perspectives you need? Go to the conversations. Don’t wait for soft data to come to you. Bring yourself — and your antennae — to the communities that exist and the conversations already occurring throughout your organization. Join weekly sales meetings, drop by lunch groups or walk the halls to listen to what is being talked about — and what is not being talked about (in front of you, anyway).

Ask the difficult questions. You already know what you would like to uncover (innovative thinking, hard work, loyalty, determination), and you, like all of us, have filters that cause you to see the world in a certain way. To cut through these barriers you need to ask the tough questions — those questions that make people nervous or for which you may be a bit afraid to hear the answers. If you don’t reveal the elephants in every room — repeatedly — then you will quickly go the way of every historic regime that believed its own rhetoric and carried on eating cake. We all know a Captain Oblivious. Sometimes this leader’s problem lies in personal stubbornness or is born from too lofty a view of his or her own purpose. Sometimes the leader’s heart beats too loudly and drowns out external voices, and occasionally Captain Oblivious just lacks curiosity and is aloof to the surrounding world. Whatever the root, the same chain of frustration, mockery and poor results will flow. Clearly, we all have our own Captain Oblivious moments as we get overwhelmed by the challenges we face or as we too quickly proceed from a bias for action. So make sure you tune in more consistently to read your leadership context effectively. Successful leaders also rewritecontext in order to achieve the organization’s goals. But that is a topic for another day.

By SVP Consulting, Stephen Parker

Copyright © 2009 BlessingWhite, Inc.

Add comment May 7th, 2009